The Play's Almost Here

You should reserve tickets by going to junglewomanofthejungle@yahoo.com. They are $15, but go up to $18 at the door. So reserve them!

There's also more info about the play times and stuff if you email them.

Can I Get A Reacharound?

One of the things I love most about moving is that I end up without internet for months at a time.

Last year, I was unable to get my TimeWarner cable internet account switched over to my new apartment because it was not a real "apartment", forcing me to go with Verizon DSL.

Now I am trying to switch my Verizon DSL over to my new address, and they informed me it would take 3 weeks to switch everything over.

Why? Because they can.

Well, two weeks into my wait I get an email from Verizon informing me that "Verizon DSL may not be available in [my] area" and that "further testing is required". I am only 30 blocks from my previous apartment, but for some reason it's a big hassle. Naturally.

Oh, but they did say they were "sorry for the delay in processing [my] order".

So I applied online for TimeWarner Road Runner internet and was informed that "an order was already placed on 8/24/05" and that they could "not continue further with [my] request".

Huh?

I know I shouldn't be, but I am continually baffled by the incompetence of huge corporations. I'd complain more, but who'd listen? Certainly not Karla in customer service, whose temp agency woke her up at 10 am this morning offering this gig, that she only took because she got really trashed last night and blew, like, 200 hundred dollars on too many margaritas and stuff and she really needed that money for textbooks for that stupid Contemporary Media Issues course she signed up for only because Geoff was taking it, but, like, now they're totally broken up and it's too late to add/drop and God, the last thing she wants to do is listen to stupid people bitch about their internet problems, like, hello, do I look like I spend all day in front of a computer?

So it looks like I'll have to do some more hoop-jumping before I am "connected" again.

St. Alphonso's Pancake Breakfast

I'm behind the times, but I was checking out the MTV Video Music Awards from a few weeks ago and discovered that my friend Ken from college won the Best Editor award for editing the Gnarls Barkley video "Crazy". Long way from the days of getting stoned in the University of New Orleans television studio, trying to finish a video hours before it's due in class.

Ah, memories...

All I Want For 9/11 Is My Two Front Teeth

How many years do you think we'll have to wait until September 11th becomes a paid holiday?

The prevalence of 9/11 movies on TV and at the video store this year makes me wonder: will we get a new slate of movies each year, like all those Christmas movies? How many reinterpretations of those few hours can we get?

In an effort to be truly tasteless, I've compiled a list of possible titles for future cinematic 9/11 ruminations:

'Twas the Night Before 9/11
It's a Terrible Day
How the Grinch Stole 9/11
A 9/11 Carol
A 9/11 Story
National Lampoon's 9/11 Vacation
A Very Brady 9/11
Ernest Saves 9/11
Silent Morning, Deadly Morning
Bin Laden Is Coming To Town
Yes, Virginia, There Is A Bin Laden
The Year Without A Bin Laden
Bin Laden Conquers The Martians
The Muppets Take Al Qaeda

Just some food for thought, Hollywood.